Zlatan checks out of Man United's preferred hotel because it doesn't have a pool

Zlatan Ibrahimovic has only been a Manchester United player for a month, but he's already in peak Zlatan form for his new employers.

Zlatan's already declared his intent to become 'God of Manchester,' and took his first step towards that end by scoring a bicycle kick goal just four minutes into his debut.

But what good is becoming a deity if Zlatan can't even relax poolside on his off days? The hotel Man United had arranged for him to stay at while he looks for a place to live doesn't even have a pool.

That's simply unacceptable, so Zlatan did what Zlatan had to do, and checked out of the pool-less Lowry Hotel to move his family into the Radisson Blu a half a mile away.

The fact that the Lowry Hotel is Man United's preferred hotel and for years has been used by the team before every home game, while the Radisson is frequently used by rivals Manchester City? Who cares! A proper God makes up his own rules, and seriously, what kind of "luxury" hotel doesn't have a pool, anyway?

Now that Zlatan is here, the rest of Manchester better fall in line. And they will. Just watch: Either the Lowry Hotel will announce the opening of their new pool by summer's end, or the Radisson Blu will be the Radisson Red in no time.

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