Perfect human Xabi Alonso is an amazing juggler

Xabi Alonso is good at soccer. He is very good at soccer, in fact, and he can do amazing soccer things while lounging.

Xabi sitting down and perfectly juggling a soccer ball isn't much of a surprise. After all, he has never been the most mobile of players. His game generally consists of standing in place and hitting 40-yard passes that are inch-perfect. So sitting and controlling it like that is basically the same thing.

The most impressive thing is, as always, his beard. It is a work of art, and if not for Andrea Pirlo, it'd be the best facial hair in world soccer. His hair is also perfectly coifed, and he's generally looking magnificent, which is his constant state. Toss in that he's doing a bit of reading (Bossonomics!) -- stay in school kids so you can be smart like your idol Xabi -- and he's basically perfect.

In conclusion, Xabi is spectacular in every way, shape and form. Marvel at him.