For Wichita's 'Trick Shot' Titus, 2013 has been one crazy ride
KANSAS CITY, Mo. —Psssst. Hey. Titus? Buddy? Look, small bit of advice. This won't mean a darn thing now, but trust us, it's something you're going to want to keep in mind after you turn 14 or so, and you start to see girls differently, and … well, anyway, little dude, just be sure to remember:
Don't bring the ladies home to meet Dad. He just might have a little surprise waiting for them.
"I think it'll be hilarious to show his dates," Joseph Ashby says of his son, the YouTube sensation known as "Trick Shot" Titus. " ‘Hey, do you know who this is?' I'll use that "Anchorman" line: ‘I don't know how to put this, but he's kind of a big deal.'"
Geez, Dad!
And then Papa Ashby will pull out the old 2-D projector, fire that bad boy up, and show the young ladies clips of when you were 2, cute as a button, sharp as a tack, and king of the basketball world.
Boom! Here's Titus with Shaquille O'Neal, back before he became a talk-show host.
Boom! And here's Titus with Kobe Bryant, back before he had those cybernetic legs installed.
Boom! And here's Titus with Metta World Peace, back before he became Secretary of State.
Cute, huh?
Welcome to the future, kiddo. The only things dads love more than living it is re-living it, over and over again.
"If he keeps doing things, maybe people will get tired of it, and they won't want to watch," Joseph says from his hometown of Derby, Kan., just outside of Wichita. "Maybe his whole life will be like this."
Maybe. Maybe not. Regardless, it's been a hell of a ride already. On February 3, the family went to YouTube and posted a 2:56 video of 2-year-old Titus shooting tiny balls at all kinds of tiny hoops. Three-foot rims. 5-foot rims. 7-foot rims. Stairwells. Basements. Restaurants.
It was pure toddler form -- thrown with two hands from behind his head, more like a soccer-style inbounds pass than a set shot -- but astoundingly effective. Titus came off like a pint-sized Stephen Curry, drawing swish after swish after swish.
As of Monday afternoon, the video had received 12,158,127 views.
Titus, the youngest of four siblings ranging in age from 8 to 2, as been shooting toy buckets "from the time he could hold stuff and walk at the same time," says Joseph, a recreational hoopster and former collegiate swimmer.
"He just shoots all the time. And after the first (video) went out, he got waaaay better. He's just really good. It's not because of anything I've ever told him."
Titus saw Daddy and the rest of the kids watching Miami Heat games on television -- and Joseph swears this was happening before LeBron James and Chris Bosh rolled into town -- and pretty much just started to mimic what he saw.
The rest is internet history: Word spread. Hit counts soared. The family was whisked to New York City for appearances on "FOX & Friends" and "The Today Show." Fifteen minutes of fame became 20. Then 30. Then 45.
But things hit another level in the spring, when the producers of "Jimmy Kimmel Live" suggested a running gag that would air during the NBA Finals, in which Titus would be matched up, before a live studio audience, in a height-relative free-throw contest against the likes of Jason Collins, Bryant, Peace, and O'Neal.
"I think he just think thinks he's playing basketball," the elder Ashby says. "And the crowd is a little bonus, because he likes to play to it."
The end result: Win, tie, win, and shutout win. Also, impressions a Dad won't easily forget.
Shaq?
"I'm 6-foot-4, and you just look at him and his waist comes up to your armpits. That was really weird," Joseph says. "It's like clowns on stilts."
Kobe?
"He was asking me all the time: ‘When did he start?' ‘How did he know?' And I said, ‘He'll probably have to change his form as he gets older.' And Kobe goes, ‘No, don't, he shoots just like Larry Bird.' That was a little charitable."
And the giving didn't end there. At the end of the segments, which aired this month but were actually a shot several weeks earlier in Los Angeles, Titus received a pair of Bryant's shoes, a Metta World Peace jersey, enough pricey autographs to fill the wall of a sports bar, and a $50,000 scholarship from State Farm Insurance.
"We'd bent down to Titus' height and I looked at Jimmy," Joseph recalls, "and I said, ‘Wow, I never thought I'd say this, but thank you for making fun of my 2-year-old on national television.'"
Needless to say, they hit it off. Kimmel even agreed to do a short bit in one of Dad's YouTube installments.
"It's funny to watch Twitter; Titus, after (the Kimmel segments), he trended nationwide," Joseph says. "I said, ‘We have now reached the pinnacle of social media.'"
But in the 24-hour news cycle of television and World Wide Web, things burn hot and fast -- only to burn out again, almost as quickly. Becoming an overnight sensation is easier than ever. Remaining in the public consciousness, now, that's a much, much tougher trick.
"We got some YouTube (revenue), but not life-changing money," Joseph says. "We did a commercial for Sprint, and this Kimmel thing … we don't want to turn Titus into a ‘trust-fund baby.' I think we'll probably spread the wealth between all the kids, and put a little thing toward regular expenses."
While the Miami Heat were celebrating their NBA title with a parade and rally on Monday, the other television star of the 2013 Finals -- Titus Ashby -- was shifting back into summer mode, back into the everyday toddler routine.
A little napping. A little shooting. A lot of hugs.
"He's about as good a little boy as you can imagine," Joseph says. "I just hope that this helps to family bond, so that if he doesn't become a superstar one day, we can remain friends. And not get into lawsuits over memorabilia."
You can follow Sean Keeler on Twitter @seankeeler or email him at seanmkeeler@gmail.com