NFL Week 5: Picks and predictions

Sep 11, 2016; Glendale, AZ, USA; Arizona Cardinals wide receiver Larry Fitzgerald (11) celebrates after scoring his 100th NFL touchdown during the second half against the New England Patriots at University of Phoenix Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Matt Kartozian-USA TODAY Sports

The Week 5 NFL slate has some very interesting games, and Matt Verderame gives his NFL picks and predictions for all of them.

It’s been a rough year for me. Let’s be real, your dog could be doing a better job to this point. Still, I press on because otherwise, I’ll be paying rent with monopoly money. I promise to do better (again) because, frankly, I can’t be worse.

Let’s do this.

Arizona Cardinals (-3.5) at San Francisco 49ers

This game could set back football a good 50 years. The Cardinals (1-3) are a mess and will be starting Drew Stanton. Somehow, he’s the best quarterback on the field against the 49ers (1-3), who are rolling deep with Blaine Gabbert. Wow.

Pick: Arizona 19, San Francisco 12

Tennessee Titans at Miami Dolphins (-3.5)

Speaking of setting the sport back, here comes Tennessee (1-3) and Miami (1-3). The winner of this game is really the loser, because they give up draft position.

Pick: Miami 23, Tennessee 17

Washington Redskins at Baltimore Ravens (-3.5)

The battle of Maryland. Washington (2-2) has won two straight and the offense is looking better, while Baltimore (3-1) is a very soft contender. Still, John Harbaugh won’t lose twice consecutively at home.

Pick: Baltimore 27, Washington 24

Sep 25, 2016; Indianapolis, IN, USA; Indianapolis Colts quarterback Andrew Luck (12)drops back to pass during their game against the San Diego Chargers at Lucas Oil Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Thomas J. Russo-USA TODAY Sports

Chicago Bears at Indianapolis Colts (-4.5)

Can Indianapolis (1-3) recover from a tough loss in London without a BYE week to beat Chicago (1-3) and the revamped Brian Hoyer? If the Colts lose this game, at home no less, Chuck Pagano should be canned.

Pick: Indianapolis 31, Chicago 20

New York Jets at Pittsburgh Steelers (-7)

Pittsburgh (3-1) looked insanely good against the Chiefs, and New York (1-3) decidedly did not. Ryan Fitzpatrick is a mess right now, throwing nine interceptions in the last two weeks. Not good.

Pick: Pittsburgh 34, New York 23

Houston Texans at Minnesota Vikings (-6.5)

Minnesota (4-0) is without Teddy Bridgewater and Adrian Peterson, and could care less. Mike Zimmer has his group rolling. Houston (3-1) is a decent team but a faux contender, trumped up by playing in the weak AFC South.

Pick: Minnesota 16, Houston 9

New England Patriots (-10) at Cleveland Browns

New England (3-1) is going to do things to Cleveland (0-4) that North Korea would call excessive.

Pick: New England 45, Cleveland 10

Philadelphia Eagles (-3) at Detroit Lions

Carson Wentz is taking the league by storm in Philadelphia (3-0). On the other hand, we are not sure if Jim Caldwell is still alive in Detroit (1-3). Jim, please blink, we’re scared.

Pick: Philadelphia 27, Detroit 23

Sep 11, 2016; Atlanta, GA, USA; Atlanta Falcons quarterback Matt Ryan (2) passes the ball against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers during the first quarter at the Georgia Dome. Mandatory Credit: Dale Zanine-USA TODAY Sports

Atlanta Falcons at Denver Broncos (-6)

This is the best game of the week. Atlanta (3-1) is hammering teams with the lethal combination of Matt Ryan and Julio Jones. Denver (4-0) has the best defense since the Legion of Boom was at its peak. Take the defense, and the home team.

Pick: Denver 20, Atlanta 17

Buffalo Bills at Los Angeles Rams (-2.5)

Do you love scoreless drives? Do you love bad quarterback play? Do you love two teams that are pretending to be decent on the same field? You will love Buffalo (2-2) and Los Angeles (3-1)!

Pick: Los Angeles 13, Buffalo 10

San Diego Chargers at Oakland Raiders (-3.5)

Vegas’ line is basically saying San Diego (1-3) and Oakland (3-1) are on the same level. Frankly, I agree. The Raiders have been fortunate to win a few of the games they won. San Diego can say the same the other way. Still, Mike McCoy is the difference here.

Pick: Oakland 30, San Diego 28

Cincinnati Bengals at Dallas Cowboys (EVEN)

An under-the-radar game this weekend. Cincinnati (2-2) needs to win if it wants to keep up in the AFC North. Dallas (3-1) has to defend its home turf and stay in lockstep with the Eagles.

Pick: Dallas 20, Cincinnati 19

New York Giants at Green Bay Packers (-7.5)

Green Bay (2-1) is the better team here and had an extra week to gameplan. New York (2-2) has the feel of a team coming apart at the seams thanks to Odell Beckham Jr. having the maturity of a 5-year-old.

Pick: Green Bay 33, New York 17

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Carolina Panthers (NO LINE)

Who the hell knows? Does Cam Newton play? Does it even matter? Carolina (1-3) is in legitimate trouble. Tampa Bay (1-3) is terrible. This game is unfortunate.

Pick: Carolina 21, Tampa Bay 16

Last Week: 7-8
Record: 31-32