Column: From National Pastime to National Past-Your-Bedtime

ALLISON PARK, Pa. (AP) — No.

No, you can't stay up until past midnight to watch the World Series.

No, you can't hide under your covers with the iPhone that I shouldn't have given you yet and listen to the game on the radio.

No, this isn't a lazy summer evening when it's barely dusk by 9 p.m. and when you can sleep in until 11 tomorrow. This is a school night in late October and you're in middle school now and besides, you have reading to do and you're already too cranky when we get you up in the morning.

No, actually, your late, baseball-loving grandfather never did it. The World Series was played during the day back then. The daytime. Yeah. Amazing, huh?

No. I don't care if you love the Red Sox and I don't care if you want to see Manny Machado play in his first World Series. No, I don't care that David Freese was on the Pirates until the Aug. 31 trade and is back in the part of the postseason that made him famous in the first place.

No. Go to bed. It's almost 11. You're almost 12.

No, no, no, no and no.

Also: Get off my lawn, you damn kids!